The Girl with the Donut Fingers

short fiction

Had the girl’s father not been passed out on the floor, he might have offered his wife some soothing wisdom about their newborn daughter’s unique appendages. “She’s special,” he might have said. Or “She’ll never want for sustenance.” Or “I could really go for a cup of coffee right now.”

Because what had sent the father fainting to his current position of uselessness on the floor, and the mother into a panic of “how did I create such a monster?” type thinking, was the simple fact that their daughter had been born with ten tiny jelly donut holes perched atop her ten tiny fingers.

Odd, yes. But according to the attending physician who delivered the pastry adorned infant, such oddities were not unheard of.

“I’ve seen plenty of things attached to baby’s fingers when they’re born,” he said jovially and much to the mother’s chagrin. “Mostly fingernails,” he admitted, “but I have seen a baby born with a Philips head screwdriver on his right index finger. And another born with a small shovel on e…