30 Comments

Euuw! Ick!

If that is the reaction you were going for, you WIN! You win BIG. ha ha ha

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That sounds about right. 😜

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I can't say I felt nothing ... but what was it?

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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Mmm, delicious story, Meg!

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Thank you, Kim. 😋

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The scariest part was thinking of kissing someone with cool ranch dorito breath. Yikes.

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The horror. 😱

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Yes that got me as well!

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The present tense continues to be a fine match for murder. Hopefully I’m safe as a Nacho Cheesier acolyte.

Congrats on the class and secret project! I hope they’re both hits.

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Present tense is my heavy hitter for action and feels ... the challenge comes when the narrator must cease to ... uh ... narrate.

Is Nacho Cheesier a power up from classic Nacho Cheese? Either way, I think you're safe. Everyone loves cheese. Even people who don't.

I really hope the class goes well. Teaching is one of those things I've always been told (and believed) I'd be good at and have still avoided like the plague just in case I am good at it and then have to do it forever. 😜

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The great thing about teaching forever is that you can summon a recommendation letter with negative effort.

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Happy Halloween! 🎃

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Woot!!! 👻👻👻

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Love the Doritos sex fest. Hilarious. Was it the cool ranch that gutted Brad’s brain?

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Ha! Thanks. Whatever gets the motor running, I say.

I think the Cool Ranch (and the EAT ME sign) both served as bait for a half-sized brain muncher. Cuz, you know, those are a thing. 🤣

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Well they did read the sign, didn’t they?

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THEY DID! 😁👻

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Horrors! Classic Halloween movie terror! This is great!

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Yay! Thank you, Liz.

I'm always a bit timid about writing horror because TBT, I REALLY don't like to consume it myself. I couldn't watch horror movies as a kid, and I still avoid anything super gory as an adult. But it can be fun to test the waters as a writer of the genre. So pleased to hear this one landed with a bonified horror fan. 😁😁🥂

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I don’t do a lot of gore, neither reading nor writing, but when it is done well, dare I say…tastefully…it is a treat. You did it! Just the right amount of squirm factor, and I loved that the protagonist invited the horror all unknowingly. Also, the quiet humor of the relationship (the Doritos bits were gems), eased me into the horror like wading into deep water. Chef’s kiss!

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😁🥂

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Deliciously crunchy! 🎃👻🐈‍⬛

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Cheers! 🍬

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Doritos will never be the same again.

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My work here is done. 😁😜

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Yep. You won the money shot award. 😂

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Ew eek EW

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I read this story after Halloween, just to be safe. The use of present tense speeds the story along and magnifies the tension. Skillful use of the repetition of crunching Doritos to foreshadow the ending. Horrific and unexpected ending. Congratulations!

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Thank you!!! First person present gets tricky when your protagonist needs to bite the (dorito) dust by the end. I'm glad the twist/crunch landed. 🥂

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