40 Comments
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Bill Bradbury's avatar

This was a riot! Rock solid prose, Handler!

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Meg Oolders's avatar

Attaboy, Bradbury. Clearly, you had a firm grasp on what I was trying to accomplish. 😉

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Amran Gowani's avatar

Nice pun work! I've been cooking up a similar wordplay idea for a while, so I really like this construct.

One thought re: the stock image reveal. There's definitely tension/suspense built up for the reader as they try to make sense of the story without seeing the stock photo that inspired it. That's a killer format. I wonder, however, what would happen if you revealed the photo first, then the text. Would it be funnier? Less funny? Would it thrust the reader deeper into the world from the outset? Or kill the vibe from the start?

I don't claim to know, and either choice introduces tradeoffs. Nevertheless, could be something to experiment with in future posts and see how people respond. Just a thought.

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Brian Reindel 👾⚔️'s avatar

Meg, I can't wait to see your entry for TGSSC! I think it will be a fantastic contribution. We're in the home stretch now 👍

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Wil Dalton's avatar

Ditto

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Jim Cummings's avatar

Haha! I'm on innuendo overload!

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Meg Oolders's avatar

How do you think I feel? 😂😂

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Wil Dalton's avatar

I use to want one of those Big Johnson t-shirts they sold at Hot Topic as a kid.

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Meg Oolders's avatar

Really? I had you pegged for an FBI (female body inspector) t-shirt guy. Our mall didn't have a Hot Topic. But I window shopped for racy t-shirts, fishnet tights, and penis pasta at Spencer Gifts.

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Wil Dalton's avatar

Honestly, I may have got my mall stores confused, could have been Spencers I also window shopped. The most juvenile sex joke shirt I had was a Smashing Pumpkins t-shirt with a sperm shaped astronaut circling a planet

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Meg Oolders's avatar

Did you fall victim to the Co-ed Naked phenomenon? Tell me you didn't.

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Meg Oolders's avatar

Did you wear Skidz? or Z-Cavariccis? Or B.U.M. Equipment?

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Wil Dalton's avatar

Also, no idea of these brands. Perhaps I should clarify, I walked the mall, but I didn’t shop at the mall as a kid. I got some Quicksilver shirts from Ross Dress for Less. They weren’t the coolest, but they had a cool brand tag, so I begged my mom to buy them

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Meg Oolders's avatar

I almost never wore what was trendy. Not sure if that's because I couldn't afford it or just didn't like it. The brands I mentioned were the things my classmates HAD to have. In Junior High mostly. I think I bought myself a pair of K-swiss sneakers once, but otherwise, I lived on hand-me-downs from my incredibly popular older sister. I wonder if our lack of brand connection has to do with geography.

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Wil Dalton's avatar

I don’t recall this phenomenon, so no? It’s a t-shirt gag?

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Meg Oolders's avatar

I never would have known that was a sperm if you didn't tell me. 😂 But, if it made you feel cool and dangerous once, I'm happy.

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Wil Dalton's avatar

I adored the pumpkins too much as a kid.

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Charles Bouchard's avatar

Fun story, right up my alley. Wait, what?! Very funny. I’m lucky that I know you well enough to hear your voice while reading it which makes me enjoy it even more.

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Meg Oolders's avatar

Love you, Charles/Chuck (but not Chaz). Which voice sounded more like me? The crude, overbearing salesman or the nervous potential employee. I think I answered my own question. 😂

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Charles Bouchard's avatar

Yes, I think you did

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Wendy S. Lannon's avatar

Hilarious! The title sucked me in right away!

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Meg Oolders's avatar

I'm blown away, Wendy. 😘 Thanks for reading.

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Justin Deming's avatar

Hahaha! Thank you for the laughs. 🤣

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Meg Oolders's avatar

Anytime. 🙂

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